Adored and Hated: Valentine’s Day Comes to Town.
But not everyone feels the same about this holiday. Some people happily buy cards, sweets, heart-shaped gifts, or fancy bouquets of roses for their loved ones. Others plan candlelit dinners, propose marriage, or even get married on this day. Meanwhile, some people reject the celebration and organize anti-Valentine events to protest what they see as too much commercialization. They feel that tradition pressures people to show love in material, often costly ways. These gatherings also attract people who value self-love and independence, choosing to celebrate alone to show they don’t need a partner to feel important.
In Japan, some people once protested Valentine’s Day in public. The Revolutionary Alliance of Unpopular People marched through Tokyo’s Shibuya Crossing with the message that a person’s value should not depend on how much chocolate they get. This protest highlighted a Japanese tradition in which women usually give men sweets on February 14, and the amount of chocolate given indicates how strong their feelings are.
Between devoted romantics and outspoken critics stand those who feel neutral about the holiday. For them, Valentine’s Day is just another February date on the calendar. They believe love and respect should be expressed daily, not only on special occasions.
Who Was St. Valentine? Between Legend and History
The identity of St. Valentine remains one of the most intriguing mysteries behind the holiday. In early Christianity, at least three saints bore this name, and historians still debate which one inspired the celebration. Many scholars point to Valentine of Interamna (modern Terni, Italy), whose life was described by the Dominican monk Jacobus de Voragine in The Golden Legend.
Legend tells the story of Bishop Valentine of Terni, a healer who converted many Romans to Christianity. While in Rome, Valentine cured the son of the famous orator Crato of a severe deformity. According to legend, he healed the young man through prayer, leading both the boy and his parents to convert to Christianity. News of Valentine’s extraordinary gift spread throughout the city, and his preaching brought many townspeople to the Christian faith. His growing influence angered the authorities, and he was eventually imprisoned and executed.
Another popular legend associated with the Roman priest Valentine of Rome has a romantic and tragic tone. During the reign of the harsh Emperor Claudius II, marriage was forbidden for soldiers of the imperial legions. The emperor believed that single men would make braver warriors—soldiers without families, he thought, would fight more fiercely because they had nothing to lose.
But, as the saying goes, an emperor’s decree means little to a loving heart. Despite the ban, legionnaires continued to fall in love. Priest Valentine came to the aid of these forbidden lovers and secretly married them at night, blessing their unions in defiance of imperial law. He also acted as a romantic messenger, carrying letters between soldiers and their beloveds, reconciling quarrels, and even giving flowers to those in love.
Eventually, Emperor Claudius learned of the secret weddings and ordered Valentine’s arrest and execution. According to legend, while imprisoned, Valentine fell in love with Julia, the daughter of a guard who visited him in his cell. Before his death, he wrote her a farewell note, signing it with the words: “From your Valentine.”
Another version of the story tells that Valentine was also a healer who secretly married couples. When a prison guard asked him to cure his blind daughter, Julia, Valentine prepared an eye ointment and told him to return later. Before that could happen, Claudius II discovered that Valentine had continued to perform Christian marriages and sentenced him to death. On the eve of his execution, Valentine gave Julia a letter with a sprig of saffron inside, signed “Your Valentine.”
Legend says that on the day of his execution, Julia touched the healing plant, and her sight was miraculously restored.
Paradoxically, the origins of the most romantic holiday are rooted in tragedy. Valentine was executed on February 14, 269. Today, his relics are kept in the Basilica of St. Valentine in Terni, where visitors still leave written prayers and requests.
Some historians also link Valentine’s Day to the ancient Roman festival of Lupercalia, a pagan fertility celebration held in mid-February. In the late 5th century, Pope Gelasius I abolished Lupercalia and replaced it with a Christian feast day in honor of St. Valentine. However, the holiday’s true origins remain uncertain. In 1969, the Catholic Church even removed St. Valentine’s feast day from the general Roman calendar due to the lack of reliable historical evidence.
From Martyrdom to Romance: The Medieval Reinvention
It is worth remembering that until the fifteenth century, St. Valentine’s Day had nothing to do with romance or the union of two hearts. It was simply a day to honor a Christian martyr. The romantic meaning we associate with it today emerged much later, thanks largely to the medieval English poet Geoffrey Chaucer.
In his poem Parlement of Foules (The Parliament of Birds), Chaucer was the first to link Valentine’s Day with love. He wrote the poem to celebrate the engagement of King Richard II to Anne of Bohemia, who would later become Queen of England. The poem unfolds as a dream-vision in which the narrator finds himself in the Garden of Love, where, on Valentine’s Day, a great gathering of birds assembles to choose their mates. Chaucer did not choose this date by accident—at the time, there was a popular belief that birds paired off on this very day.
Through vivid natural imagery, Chaucer expressed the ideals of courtly love, a genre that captivated medieval society. His poem inspired other writers to weave Valentine’s Day into their own romantic works. Yet modern scholars suggest that Chaucer and his contemporaries may have been referring to a lesser-known Valentine’s feast celebrated in Genoa in May, rather than the February date we know today.
Three major forces helped transform Valentine’s Day into a celebration of love for the masses. The first was Chaucer’s influential poem, the second was the flourishing cult of love in courtly medieval poetry, and the third was the long Hundred Years’ War, which intensified themes of longing and devotion in literature. Medieval writers shaped a lasting vision of the Day of Love, gifting the world enduring symbols—birds as emblems of freedom, harmony, and affection, and flowers as signs of beauty, renewal, and fertility.
From these traditions arose the enchanting custom of giving flowers to one’s beloved and dedicating poems to those who inspire the heart—a legacy of medieval romance that continues to this day.
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The association of February 14 with an annual celebration of love dates back to the year 1400. That year, a society known as the Court of Love was founded in France as a diversion from the devastating plague epidemic. This informal club emerged at the court of King Charles VI and initially included around 950 members, ranging from the king himself to petty-bourgeois members. According to the society’s charter, members were required to gather for a grand dinner every February 14.
During these festivities, men sang songs they had composed for the ladies and took part in poetry and dance competitions, where the female audience served as the principal judges and critics. All performances and creations revolved around themes of love, devotion, and passion, turning the evening into a celebration of romance and courtly affection.
Medieval literature established many enduring romantic symbols—birds, flowers, and poetic declarations—that remain central to Valentine’s Day today.
Love Letters, Handmade Cards, and the Birth of Valentines
Today, with technology everywhere, many people can’t remember the last time they wrote a heartfelt letter by hand or felt the excitement of finding one in their mailbox. The days of slow, thoughtful letters, carefully sealed envelopes, and waiting for a reply are mostly gone. Life moves quickly now, and we rarely take time to enjoy writing letters. Instead, we use faster but less personal ways to communicate, such as email, social media, and instant messaging. Most people now buy ready-made Valentine’s cards instead of making their own. In the past, though, handwritten letters meant a lot and helped people form close emotional connections.
The first known author of a Valentine’s letter is the French duke and poet Charles of Orléans. In 1415, during the Battle of Agincourt, he was captured by the English and imprisoned in the Tower of London. Like the Christian martyr Valentine, Charles sent romantic messages to his beloved wife, Bonne of Armagnac, to ease the loneliness of captivity. In a series of love poems, he addressed her tenderly as “my Valentine,” decorating his letters with hearts. One of these moving letters has survived to this day and is preserved in the British Museum in London.
Over time, the celebration of the Day of Love grew increasingly popular. In Europe—especially in England and France—Valentine’s Day began to be observed as early as the thirteenth century, while in the United States it gained popularity toward the end of the eighteenth century. At first, the custom of sending romantic letters was reserved for the wealthy, who could afford to hire artists and poets to compose elegant verses. Gradually, however, the tradition spread more widely. By the seventeenth and eighteenth centuries, lovers and friends exchanged handmade postcards and letters crafted from silk, feathers, dried flowers, beads, and colorful paper, signed in bright inks. These messages were often adorned with flowers, hearts, cupids, and romantic poetry.
While the English are often considered pioneers of the Valentine tradition, the French enriched it with poetic elegance. For those who lacked poetic talent, special “Valentine’s books” were published, offering ready-made verses that could be copied into love cards.
Yet not all Valentins were filled with sweetness. Some carried bitterness and cruelty. In the Victorian era, a peculiar tradition emerged: “vinegar valentines.” These were sarcastic, sometimes vicious postcards sent anonymously, especially in Britain and America. They featured rude caricatures and biting insults about the recipient’s profession, appearance, habits, or character. Many suffragettes, for example, received such cards, mocked for their fight for voting rights and accused of losing their femininity. These postcards were cheap, often sent in secret, and frequently torn up or burned in anger and shame.
Historians believe that such cruel messages reflected the rigid etiquette and emotional restraint of Victorian society. Perhaps they were a way to release suppressed feelings or express irony in a world where open emotions were discouraged. Though the custom began in England, it soon spread to the United States—and sometimes led to tragic consequences. In 1847, a woman in New York took her own life after receiving a vinegar valentine from the man she loved. In England, a man shot his wife in a rage after receiving one from her. After such incidents, authorities began shutting down shops that sold these postcards, and the postal service refused to deliver them. By the end of the nineteenth century, the tradition was eradicated in England, though it lingered in other parts of the world until the Second World War.
When printing was invented, people started making printed valentines. In the early 1800s, these cards were mass-produced. At first, they were simple black-and-white cards made from cheap paper. Over time, they became more detailed and colorful. Eventually, people began using the best paper, lace, and satin ribbons to make valentines, and they became a popular extra gift.
During the Second World War, letters became a crucial means of connecting parted hearts. For those in the military, the post office played a vital role in maintaining morale. Valentine’s was a meaningful way to express love and affection. At the World War II National Museum in New Orleans, you can see valentines that a young American woman, Jean Porritt, sent to her husband, a soldier. Due to the war, newlyweds and future parents Richard and Jean Porritt could not spend Valentine’s Day together. Therefore, they could only demonstrate their deep connection through these love letters. Jean missed her husband so much that she expressed her boundless love to him not with one but with a whole series of romantic and inspiring letters.
Jean sent the first postcard before the holiday in January. Inside the illustrated folding postcard, she wrote a short phrase in turquoise ink that became a signature feature of her letters: “Love, guess who!” Below that, she drew an arrow pointing to the back where the answer was. On the reverse side, Jean expressed how much she missed her husband and how desperately she awaited his return. A week later, she sent two more letters. In early February, she sent him her portrait. Two days before Valentine’s Day, Richard received another love letter from Jean, recalling the joyful moments they shared before military circumstances separated them. On the last page was the imprint of a kiss. To evoke pleasant memories for her husband, Jean sprinkled the letter with the perfume she had worn on their wedding day and during their honeymoon. Finally, a month after Valentine’s Day, she sent one last Valentine because she still had an unused card. She demonstrated her creativity by crossing out a few words to turn it into a congratulatory message.
The Commercial Valentine: From Esther Howland to Global Industry
The tradition of celebrating Valentine’s Day was brought to North America by immigrants from Great Britain. In the United States, however, the holiday—and especially the exchange of romantic postcards—was popularized by Esther Howland of Worcester, Massachusetts. Thanks to her influence, she became known as the “Mother of the American Valentine.”
According to legend, in 1847, Esther received an English Valentine card from one of her father’s business partners. Whether or not the gentleman won her favor, the gesture sparked a remarkable business idea. Noticing that imported English cards were costly, Esther realized it would be far more profitable to produce them domestically.
Fortunately, her father owned a large book and stationery store, S.A. Howland and Sons. With her parents’ encouragement, Esther ordered fine paper, lace, and decorative trims from suppliers in England and Germany and began producing valentines at home. The finished cards were sold with the help of her traveling-salesman brothers, while friends assisted in a home-based assembly-line operation.
Esther set up her office in the family home’s guest room on Summer Street. Notably, her production line employed only women—at a time when just 10–15 percent of women worked outside the home. Esther personally designed the valentines, and her assistants carefully reproduced each one. Tasks were divided: one person cut out illustrations, another prepared backgrounds, and a third embellished the messages. Annual profits reportedly reached around $100,000.
She introduced innovative design elements, including layered messages, painted silk, and intricate folding techniques. Her range included simple five-cent cards as well as elaborate $1 valentines—a considerable sum at the time—crafted with silk, satin, ribbons, and gilded lace. Eventually, Esther named her enterprise the New England Valentine Company.
In February 1850, the first advertisement for her valentines appeared in the Worcester Daily Spy. Her signature style proved commercially successful thanks to its beauty and her keen attention to customer demand. Americans quickly embraced the tradition of exchanging colorful valentines, often accompanied by marzipan hearts. Until the 19th century, these sweets were considered luxurious gifts, affordable only to the wealthy.
In Germany, Valentine’s Day celebrations began much later, only after World War II. It is widely believed that American soldiers introduced the holiday. The first “St. Valentine’s Ball” took place in Nuremberg on February 14, 1950, and the celebration has grown in popularity ever since. Advertising campaigns by the flower industry played a key role in promoting the holiday, which is sometimes humorously referred to as the “Day of German Flower Shops.”
In 2008 and 2009, Deutsche Bahn operated a popular speed-dating event called the “Flirt-Express.” Although the name coincidentally matches Stadler’s FLIRT regional train models, these were specially organized dating events held on dedicated or regional trains across Germany.
Singles met for three to five minutes at a time, with a signal indicating when to switch seats. The journeys were designed specifically for romantic speed dating: two single passengers sat opposite one another, chatted for five minutes, and then moved on to meet new potential matches.
If a connection formed during the trip, participants could continue their date at the reserved cafés and bars near the stations. In the case of mutual interest, Deutsche Bahn sent participants each other’s contact details by email a few days later.
Love Across Cultures: Global Valentine’s Traditions
Valentine’s Day is also marked by some rather unusual traditions around the world. In Denmark, for example, people celebrate in a uniquely playful way. On this day, men anonymously send their beloved gaekkebrev—short poems or rhymed love notes. The only clue to the sender’s identity is the number of letters in his name, and the recipient must guess who her secret admirer is. If she guesses correctly, she wins an Easter egg; if not, she owes him one.
In Italy, February 14 is known as the “Sweet Holiday.” A popular gift on this day is Baci Perugina—small hazelnuts coated in chocolate. Each piece contains a romantic note printed in four languages. According to tradition, the more chocolate you give, the stronger your love will grow.
In France, even an ordinary tomato takes on special meaning on Valentine’s Day. In French, a tomato is called pomme d’amour, meaning “apple of love.” Preparing a heart-shaped tomato salad for your loved one is believed to inspire deep affection and lasting devotion.
In Iceland, men traditionally give women pendants made of small stones, while women return the gesture with necklaces of coal. The friction between the two materials is said to symbolize the spark that ignites a flame of passion. In Wales, a popular Valentine’s gift is the carved wooden “spoon of love,” decorated with hearts, keys, and locks, conveying the message: Unlock my heart.
Extravagant gestures also have their place in Valentine’s lore. In 1960, Aristotle Onassis gave Maria Callas a jeweled golden heart worth hundreds of thousands of dollars, packaged in a luxurious mink coat—one of the most lavish Valentine’s gifts on record.
Love in Nature: Romance Beyond Humans
Valentine’s Day may not be celebrated in nature, yet an atmosphere of pure, genuine love is unmistakably present. One touching example is the bond between swan couples, defined by devotion and mutual care. A particularly romantic moment occurs when the birds swim toward one another, gently touching their heads and necks to form a heart.
Equally fascinating displays of care and passion can be found throughout the animal kingdom. Male emperor penguins, for instance, present females with the finest, smoothest stones during courtship. For a female penguin, such a gift is more precious than any diamond, as it becomes a vital part of the future nest where her eggs will be safely protected. When adult emperor penguins tilt their heads together over their chick, these flightless birds, too, create the delicate outline of a heart—an unspoken symbol of tenderness in the wild.
Beyond February 14: The Everyday Celebration of Love
Maybe the best Valentine’s Day isn’t about roses, chocolates, or expensive gifts, but about showing care, respect, and affection every day. Whether people love or dislike the holiday, or see it as commercial or romantic, it still reminds us of our lasting interest in love, connection, and devotion.
